Surreal jokes

Sometimes when life doesnt seem whacky enough surreal, non-sequiters help make things clear. This parody of koans is an example.
Some of my favourites would include :

Q. What's the difference between a duck?
A. One of its legs is both the same.
A. It bangs its head together when it walks.
A. Well, [holding out hands as if to demonstrate its size] it's about this colour.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Two functions, x^2 and e^x are walking down the street. Off in the distance they see a differential operator walking towards them. e^x turns to x^2 and tells him: "You better get out of here! If that operator differentiates you a few times you'll disappear, but he can differentiate me all he wants and I'll stay the same."

So x^2 runs off and e^x goes to greet the differential operator. "Hi, I'm e^x" he says. "What's your name?"

The operator looks at him with a demonic grin and says: "d/dy".
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Descartes walks into a bar and orders a drink. He sips it for a while, and when he is finished, the bartender asks him if he'd like another. Descartes says, "I think not", and disappears.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A traveling salesman is driving down a country road when he comes across a farmer who is standing in his orchard, hoisting pigs into the apple trees with ropes. He stops. "What are you doing?" the salesman asks. "I'm feeding the pigs," answers the farmer, incredulous that someone could ask a question with such an obvious answer. "Well," says the salesman, "why don't you let the apples fall to the ground, gather them up in baskets, and feed the pigs that way?" The farmer ponders, then says, "Hmmmm. Yes, I guess I could do it that way. But what would be the point?" The salesman is a bit exasperated: "Well, it would save time, wouldn't it?" The farmer ponders again. "Yes," he says after a pause, "I guess it would save time. But what's time to a pig?"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------